It’s only September and the GOP is working diligently to snatch defeat from the jaws of victory one teabagger at a time.
In November 2009 a special election in upstate New York for House seat NY-23 was won by Democtrat Bill Owens, the first time a Democrat won that seat since 1872. Owens won the election when the Republican vote was split between GOP establishment candidate Dede Scozzafava and Tea Party favorite and Sarah Palin-endorsed candidate Doug Hoffman. It was, perhaps, a harbinger of the GOP implosion to come; of right-wing extremists sabotaging Republican chances to gain control of the House, the Senate or both in the upcoming general election.
Following the shocking results of NY-23, Repblicans have nominated candidates who put into question races that should otherwise be easy victories for the GOP. In Nevada Sharron Angle earned the nod in the Senate race for the seat currently held by the wildly unpopular incumbant Harry Reid. In what should have been a landslide victory in November for any candidate not named Reid, the GOP nominated perhaps the only person outside an insane insylum who could lose to him. Sharron Angle has some boilerplate conservative positions such as eliminating the Department of Education and the IRS as well as privatizing Social Security. Absurd ideas, of course, but standard fare for right-wing conservatives. But here Angle seals her fate in the annals of comedic parody with positions such as: using Scientology-based rehabilitation for prison inmates, resurrecting Prohibition (apparently Angle forgets she would be representing Las Vegas), and repealing all offshore oil drilling regulations. (source) Good-bye Senate seat.
In Kentucky the GOP has nominated Rand Paul who finds the Civil Rights Act to be an unjust extension of federal power. You know the routine: big government and all that. Paul has not yet resorted to code words such as States’ Rights, but we know to whom he panders. This Senate race is now tenuous for the GOP.
And now, in Delaware, Republicans have nominated Christine O’Donnell to run for the Senate seat long-held by Vice President Joe Biden. Winning a shocking victory in Tuesday’s primary election, O’Donnell beat moderate Republican Mike Castle. According to pollster extraordinaire Nate Silver at fivethirtyeight.com, Castle had a 95% chance of beating Democratic candidate Chris Coons. In other words, Castle was a shoo-in to earn one Republican Senate seat in November. O’Donnell, however, has only a 17% chance of beating Coons. Oops. Good-bye Senate seat #2.
O’Donnell’s victory is shocking. To understand why one must look only at her positions and bona fides. O’Donnell is: a frigid moralist and anti-masturbation crusader, liar, chronic debtor who steals campaign funds, took 21 years to complete her Bachelor’s degree, files frivolous lawsuits and is a paranoid dipshit. (Source 1, Source 2) Unsurprising to no one, O’Donnell earned Sarah Palin’s Mama Grizzlie endorsement. Presumed but not verified, Palin embraces O’Donnell because the latter makes the former look smart and principled by comparison.
ThePoopdeck has awarded Christine O’Donnell our highest rating of Five Shits.